I am confused, are you?

I was born a 3rd generation Malaysian Chinese. Raised as a Taoist. Both parents are Hokkiens but we speak Cantonese at home. Simply because my parents spoke Cantonese when they first met, dated & subsequently got hitched in Seremban....hmmm... By the way, Seremban's first language/dialect amongst the Chinese is Cantonese (ahem, if you must know!)

All my 16 paternal first cousins including my 2 brothers were Chinese-educated, while I was the only one that was English-educated. Why? That, you got to ask my mother! Psst, psst.....years later, she divulged that she thought English was the way for the future...very far-sighted my mom and she was right. English was indeed very relevant & important language during my working days. It helped that I was English-educated. Strangely, both my younger brothers were Chinese-educated? Hmmm....strange and confusing what goes through my mom's mind!!!


To know what are first or second cousins, refer below : (Credits to Wikipedia)

First cousins The children of two siblings. David and Emma are first cousins because their fathers were brothers.	Adam Agatha Betty Ben Charles Corinda David Emma
Second cousins The children of two first cousins. Frank and Gwen are second cousins because Frank's father, David, and Gwen's mother, Emma, are first cousins.	Adam Agatha Betty Ben Charles Corinda Dawn David Emma Edward Frank Gwen

Traditionally, as a married Chinese, the female (in this case, my mom) will have to follow the traditions, culture & rites of her husband's family. It is deemed that once you are married into the Lee family (my surname) you will die as a Lee clan. So, everything my mom did has to be 'approved' by my maternal grandmother.

I was sent to a Catholic school in Seremban. I completed 12 years of my education there. From kindy to Secondary 5. Convent - a renowned & an all girls school. We were taught by local & foreign nuns as well as local teachers. But I must say that the nuns has a special place in each of our hearts due to their dedication, passion and love. We still talked about their work, dedication and passion 3 decades down the road. We, class of 1979 recently had our 1st grand reunion after 33 years. To know more...please go to :       http://superbiker48.blogspot.com/2012/07/feisty-50-reunion-convent-seremban.html

My paternal grandmother stayed with us. Naturally, as matriarch of the Lee Clan (our own clan, obviously), I spoke to her in Hokkien. After all, she spoke Hokkien and nothing else despite having stayed in Malaysia for almost 7 decades! Apart from her, I also spoke Hokkien to my maternal grandparents, Cantonese to my parents and siblings, Mandarin to my childhood friends in Pedas, Hakka to our landlady and English & Bahasa Malaysia to my friends in school! 

WOW...what a big language 'bank' I have in my tiny brain, ya?? YA!! It's strange how our brains work. In this case, Amazing with a capital A!!! Well, that's how my life revolves back then. However, I'd always and still am THINKING in English and then translating to speak in the relevant dialect/language. I read no Chinese, basically I speak based on intonation I'd learnt & heard. Sometimes, I confuse myself as the tone is right but the meaning is different. Chinese has 4 tones for certain characters, so you can & must understand my confusion, not just mine alone. I believe many others are in the same boat as mine....speed boat? Yacht? Liner? hee heee...see I AM confusing you already!!!

When I was in Secondary 2, I wanted to be a Catholic but was deterred by my mom out of respect for my grandmother. So, I patiently waited. 3 decades later, I am practicing Buddhism, not Taoism. Now you know why my title says I am confused!!! Hehehehe.... 

Fast forward, I met Rocker57. He is also a Hokkien & educated in a Methodist school. We speak Hokkien & English interchangeably but we raised our kids speaking only English. That's because we know the importance of English. Our kids understands Hokkien, Cantonese & Mandarin. 

My daughter speaks Mandarin quite fluently I must say. She picked it up during her varsity days. And she has improved on her Hokkien having worked in Klang (Hokkien speaking 'zone') for almost 3 years. She can also converse in commendable Cantonese. Hmmm...she has my genes!!! YAY!!

My son speaks a smattering of Mandarin and a tad of Cantonese, and is always confused between the 3 - Mandarin, Cantonese & Hokkien. Why, when he was in Kindergarten, he used to tell his kindy friends he was English! When I asked why he said that? He said with a straight face" Mom, we speak English!" Then, when he learned more about dialects...he often confuse himself whether he is Hakka or Hokkien! He can't differentiate the dialects...poor kid!

Our kids speaks to the paternal grandparents in smattering of Hokkien with a mixture of Mandarin. They conversed in Mandarin with my parents. 

So you see...it IS a confusing world, yet our brains can register and remember who to speak in what language/dialect. As confused as I am...I am multi-lingual....and THAT is certainly clear as the blue skies above I am not confuse when it comes to dialect.

Now...shall I learn a new language? What say you? Come share your thoughts with me.....

Till my next blog...take care, stay happy and positive always!

Sayonara!!!